re·lent·less

My 2016 was eventful. The highs were super exhilarating and the lows belong in a black chick lit screenplay. But overall, 2016 was a good chapter in Sharonda’s book of life. 

For the past 5 years, I’ve taken my cue from Susan Conway and completed my Unraveling the Year document. My 2016 word was “intentional” and throughout the year, I made sure my actions, in every aspect of my life, connected to that word.

But my energy shifted July 2017 when I attended C2. C2 is the ultimate business conference and retreat for women of color in communications. (Go to the website and see me on the picture reel) :)

I attended the event for my professional development, but never expected to meet a new heroine.

Tiffany Smith-Anoa'i (the one in glasses)

 During a panel discussion, Tiffany Smith-Anoa'i spoke about the turning point in her career and for the first time in a long time, I felt that tingly feeling you get when you a new boo sends you that “good morning beautiful” text. She had my full attention!

Tiffany told us about the day she asked herself about her career and her next step. She said the question “What do you really want to do” kept replaying in her head. She wasn’t talking about a job title or figuring out her next place she to work. Tiffany was contemplating what type of work she wanted to do and what legacy she wanted to leave in her industry. She saw a need for a diversity and inclusion executive for entertainment and she worked “relentlessly” to bring that to CBS. Now, she’s the SVP Entertainment Diversity & Communications at CBS Entertainment.

Tiffany closed with this wisdom: “I created my way to the top, not worked my way to the top.” When she said that, I almost rushed the stage to hug her. I refrained though. Getting to the top does not consist of jail.

When I finally was able to get her alone, I told her that her words motivated, inspired and challenged me. I told her I wanted to follow her lead. Tiffany smiled, gave me her business card and said, “Be relentless and do it. Here’s my card if you need help.” (Read more about her work in TIME.)

That conference and conversation replays in my head almost daily. I placed a picture of Tiffany on my vision board at work so I never forget her story and inspiration. 

Vision board at work

So, of course my 2017 word is relentless.
According to Merriam-Webster, relentless means “showing or promising no abatement of severity, intensity, strength, or pace.” I'm going to be a mini-Granniabelle: STRAIGHT, NO CHASER.

I’m going relentlessly pursue the experiences, places and people I care about and relentlessly dismissive of the/things I don’t. It’s a strong word and full of moxie to encourage meaningful results. I’m ready. God used my 2016 to open up doors and I have a feeling that was just the warm up.

What’s your word for 2017?

My word for 2016

Ever since I was introduced to Susannah Conway’s Unraveling workbook, I’ve been sending it to my friends and family like I’m her brand ambassador. In a sense, I am exactly that. I love the positive energy that comes from reflecting on the year that’s passing and plotting out steps for the next 12 months.

Part of the Unraveling workbook makes you choose a word for the year. As Susannah puts it, your word is “a mantra, a meditation, a reminder, a promise. A word can be interpreted in different ways. A word can’t be “broken” — it feels gentler somehow.” I agree.

My words in the past have been a powerful force that helped guide me through the year. When I did or said anything, I thought, “Does this fall in line with your word for the year?” I definitely fell short sometimes, but having a word for the year helped me get back on track.

In 2015, I was all about the word “order.”

My 2016 word is INTENTIONAL. I realize that when I make a conscious effort to do or say something, the results are very powerful. And now that my inner light is back, I need to focus on protecting who and what is in my space. What I’m doing, saying, participating in, and visiting, reading and loving all need to be intentional so that I can maintain and spread this light. My intentions will send my light to places, people and things in a way that surpasses how I have in the past.

I asked a few of my friends to share their word with me and why they chose it. Here’s a bit of what they shared:

• Adventure: I want to be unusual and exciting in every aspect of my life: career, relationship, spirituality. I want to try something new and keep it fresh!

• Cultivation: Every year, I focus on something new, but this year, I want to sharpen my skills and hone my craft. I want to build upon my strengths.

• Driven: My vision board is all about taking a conscious effort on my part. I wanted to remind myself that I need to work hard to achieve everything I want. 

• Expectancy: I need to work more on really expecting good things to happen instead of worrying about it not.

• Fierce: I want to have a sense of urgency that forces me to focus.

• Legacy: I just started a family and I’m thinking about how to start and carry on traditions.

• Magic: “Life is tricky baby. Stay in your magic.” I’m often reminded how impactful my energy is and this year, I know the atmosphere feels different. 

• Manifest: I'm learning that after I get understanding, then it's time for me to bring it forth into the physical.

• Release: I want to let go of resentment and hurt from my past. I want to be free to love myself.

• Yes: A simple word with lot of meaning.

WHAT'S YOUR WORD FOR 2016?

2015 Recap

My 2015 Vision Board

With only 20 days left in 2015, I’ve been in deep reflection mode.

Usually at the end of the year, my mind is heavy with thoughts about all of the things I didn’t accomplish, but this year is different. Instead of giving energy to the things I didn’t do, I’m focusing and celebrating all of the amazing blessings and opportunities that 2015 provided.

ORDER: My 2015 word was “order” because I felt an internal push to make some changes. To get to what I wanted, I needed to align my thoughts, prayers, circle of friends and actions in a more orderly way. As a planner, I used Susannah Conway’s “Unraveling” to help me map out my 2015.

My goals were simple. Get my finances, physical, spiritual and emotional house in the best order I could by June 2015. Here’s what I accomplished in 2015:

1. On a couch I started and finished my psychotherapy. This experience helped me get over that final hump in my depression (that’s another post).
2. $$. I saved money for my move, although I had no job or idea of where I would land. I applied to jobs in Florida, Hawaii and California and considered Africa, London and Spain.
3. Lost flab I lost 7 pounds. I worked with a nutritionist to help me stay accountable with my eating. It was a really hard process but worth it. 
4. Jesus time Although I joined New Life Covenant years ago, I still hadn’t finished the New Members classes. Triflin, I know. So, I finally did and joined a ministry. I miss them so much.
5. Carpe Diem.I told all my friends that this was my last year in Chicago and that we need to live each moment like it was our last. Again, I had zero job but I knew my time was ending in Chicago. 
6. Toxic Friendship Supporting, loving and caring for undeserving people is silly and hurtful, especially when someone questions your integrity and honesty. It was time for mine to end.
7. Time, talent, treasure I extended my philanthropy to financial support. For my 30th, I had a giving plan, but I was unable to fulfill it. I modified it a bit. I gave $19.13 to 8 organizations.
8. Faith steps I stepped out on faith, again. Moving to Chicago was a huge leap of faith. I had no friends, no family and no job. I did the same with my summer move to Miami. I had no friends or family here, but I just trusted God would show up. He has.
9. Jetsetter I traveled. A lot. Ohio, California (multiple trips there), Philly, Florida and Phoenix were my destinations. I enjoyed family and friends while celebrating life and love.
10. OO-OOP I became active and financial with Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. I’m not proud of this fact, but I took a break from DST, financially and through my participation. But my undergrad chapter’s 50th anniversary sparked that love and loyalty that I had when I joined. Feels good to be back!

What did you accomplish in 2015?