The hopeful romantic in me is still alive!

I'm a huge book lover. For the most part, I enjoy all book genres, especially chick lit and historical fiction. The nerd in me still goes to the library to check out books! But ever since I got my new iPad Mini, I've been downloading books like crazy, both free and paid!  I recently downloaded a contemporary romance novel that was more than a great read, it was an experience...

My first introduction to Wendy Owens was through the book Stubborn Love. It is a story about a young woman, Emmie, who moves to New York City to finish her art degree after having her world turned upside down from her husband's suicide.  Although she's in NYC for school and to launch her career, she connects with three other characters, Paige, Colin and Christian.  Paige is her roommate and challenges Emmie to leave her Midwest roots and explore/enjoy life. Paige is the girl we all have in our friend clique; she’s sassy, confident and always makes you feel like you are invincible.

Stubborn Love is a page turner because you encounter how a damaged person tries battles with her past while trying to look forward to her future. Enter Colin Bennett. The connection between Colin and Emmie is the main storyline. Colin becomes a friend, distraction and love interest all at once. He’s the man that you purposely push away but secretly want to fight to stay around. He’s also the guy who does subtle things to let you know he’s deeply in love with you.  The term, “swept off my feet” applies to Colin’s intentions with Emmie. What I loved most about this character was how he becomes the biggest supporter of her talent and dreams.  Stubborn in Love is one of those books that gives you comfort about taking risks in relationships. 

 

Only In Dreams, I sighed deeply (thinking about my own first love) and cried tears of joy (the climax of this story had me anxious). This time, the main storyline is around Paige and Christian. You learn about their history and their relationship in Stubborn in Love but you get all the emotions in this book. What I love about Paige was her devotion to Christian. She’s what many would call “ride or die” because she stuck by him for years although he didn’t have much and wasn’t living up to his potential.

In Owens' sequel,

And then there's Henry, Paige's fiance and probably the most amazing male character I've read in a long time. His protection, provision and purpose in Paige's life is what every girl dreams of. Henry is also one of those characters that you love the moment you meet him. This is how I felt about Mr. Darcy after reading of his pridefulness!

The emotions I experienced all throughout reading Only In Dreams renewed some of the optimism and "hopeful" romantic idealism that I've been missing. If you are in the mood for a great story with unforgettable characters, definitely read both Stubborn Love and Only In Dreams.

Speed Dating

In my 30s, I decided to be open-minded in my dating. With that, I'm considering new possibilities including blind dates (my last blind date was in 2008), interracial dates (my last one was junior year of high school), speed dating and one day, online dating (in the winter when I'm not saving money to travel). I'm not looking for love, just company and fun.

A few ago, I was invited to attend a speed dating event with Urban Fast Lane Love. I agreed to attending because I was so curious. So many questions ran through my head....What was it like? What kind of men attend? Am I lame/desperate for attending speed dating? 

I decided to attend and find out first-hand what speed dating was about. Even if it was a flop, with my dating luck, I knew it could have some funny stories. And of course, I was right!

SPEED DATING
The cost to attend was $25. I didn't think that was a bad price and far cheaper than online dating. The price included one cocktail of your choice. I ordered my good ole faithful, a Jameson and Ginger.

Speed dating is a small, intimate setting where you have five minutes to get to know your date. You write their name down and then you chat, trying to learn all you can to see if this person is a potential match. After the five minutes are over, the men switch tables and meet their next date. At the end of the night, you check "yes" or "no" and then the event organizers email you the contact information of your matches.

I arrived extra early so I could scout the room. After returning from the bathroom, I sat at the bar and ordered my drink. I immediately made eye contact with some lame sporting a Bulls cap and a blazer. He looked like a Southside Quasimodo! I immediately thought, Lord, please don't let all of the men look like this!

I didn't want to ruin my night so I ended my scouting and redirected my attention to Words with Friends and Instagram. I wanted to be surprised by the men that I met that night.

There were a total of 9 women who attended and 8 men.

THE DATES
The first three conversations were awkward, but I kept laughing and cracking sarcastic jokes to lighten the mood. The men were nervous, too.

After I got to date four, I started to have fun. I realized the men were putting on their best face to get that "yes" checked next to their name at the end of the night. By my last date, all I could think about was getting some food because I was starving. I'm convinced Jameson makes you hungry!

FLOW DATING
Flow dating is similar in the time you have to talk, but the difference is, you are given one prompt question with each date. The event I attended was put on by Paul Brunson and sponsored by BET.

The prompt questions about sex, divorce and seduction with a complete stranger made an already awkward experience really uncomfortable! There was even one date where you had to give your date your best massage! For the record, I'm extremely uncomfortable with touching. I'm like a baby, I need time to warm up to you!

I know Paul Brunson is known for flow dating, but those questions were not necessary.  By date #2 of 9, I was ready to leave. Oh, and the men at this event were not as attractive as the speed dating event. Their conversation was also really boring. One guy even insulted me by telling me my finish time for my half-marathons was "pathetic". Yes, theses were his exact words. He also had on a bedazzled t-shirt from him t-shirt company so I just sat and started at him, trying not to laugh in his face. I failed.

MY END VERDICT
With both speed dating and flow dating, I matched with 5 men. To date, I've only been out on one of the guys I met. We've had three fun dates and he seems nice. One guy has called, emailed, and sent text, but no date. The last guy has annoyed me twice and potentially will be deleted from my phone if I don't hang out with him by the end of March. Two men have never called.

Would I attend speed dating and flow dating again? Yes, probably, I had a good time meeting new men. Love matches? No, but that's perfect for me at this time.My heart is on lock-down for awhile...

Have you every attended a speed dating event? What was your experience like?

5 Gym Etiquette Rules

I enjoy going to the gym. It is my time to work hard, sweat, and get out my frustrations. I need my workouts because they truly help me with my mental health. I also go to the gym because I don’t want to be fat. Curves are cool, but fat, not so much.

There have been times during my gym visits that I have become annoyed or amused. In fact, every time I go, I think to myself, are they serious? There have been a few instances when I want to drop kick people, mostly silly women. 

Like everything, I think there’s a certain decorum one should have when in public places. The gym is no different.

Here are my top 5 gym etiquette rules:

1. Wear deodorant: I'm not sure why this is negotiable for some folks. You come to the gym to work hard for your fitness goals. You will sweat. Sweating will make you stinky. Please use deodorant so that my nostrils aren't burning when I'm next to you.

2. When naked, wear a towel: The 55 and over women are always in violation of this rule. They walk around the locker room like they are in the comfort of their own homes. Grandma, I don't want to see your saggy breasts that touch your knees! The locker room isn't the Summer of Love or Woodstock!

3. Don't crowd my space: I love group fitness classes but I dislike how crowded some of them get. If you see my equipment up, don't set yours up 2 inches next to me. Get to class earlier so you can have your own spot.

4. Sports bras are your friend: I can't understand how women workout without a sports bra. My 34 s are throbbing if I forget mine, so I know your triple Zs are hurtin something terrible. Be kind to your girls and wear a sports bra. Please note, I will hysterically laugh at you if you bust yourself in the head with your own breast!

5. Your full face=clown face: Full face of makeup that is. When I'm at the gym, I'm in a ponytail, Vaseline, and waterproof mascara. My face is clear of foundation and even my tinted moisturizer. Why? I don't want my pores clogged and I'm not there to impress those men! Most women who wear full face also don't wear sports bras. Amateurs.

What are your gym etiquette rules? Do you laugh to yourself when someone is in violation?