10 month mark: Major Victory

Today, I celebrate the completion of my work with Leadership Miami and my 10 month mark of moving to South Florida! I’m so proud of what I’ve accomplished in less than a year.

For the past 9 months, I have been involved in the annual program which is sponsored by the Greater Miami Chamber of Commerce. The program is targeted towards men and women interested in making Miami a better place to live.

My group, More4Miami, worked with Chapman Partnership. Chapman’s mission immediately

More4Miami

resonated with me. I started Leadership Miami only after living in Miami for one month after relocating from Chicago. Joining the program was a way to get involved and educated about the issues of the community in which I work, much like my civic engagement in Chicago. Learning about Chapman’s mission and how they have single-handedly help decrease homelessness in Miami impressed and inspired me. Jumping into the work and making sure the team did an excellent job was my primary focus, but not the primary benefit I received. WATCH OUR PROJECT COMPLETION VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ygvmEFdwlg&feature=share.

What I gained from this program was a reevaluation of my own leadership strengths and weaknesses. I learned that I thrive when I have work with people who are self-starters and take initiative, like me. I tend to like them more.

This program also revealed my lack of patience for non-workers/self-starters. I set really high

expectations and when people don’t meet them, I dismiss them. Leadership Miami taught me that my approach as a leader should be to help my teammates identify their own strengths.

In all aspects of my life, I’m intentional. I engage in purposeful behavior. Developing my leadership and cultivating life-learning skills are my objectives in all of my work. Leadership Miami increased those skills. This program also helped me in my personal goals of being versatile and knowledgeable about multiple business sectors. I’ve served in corporate companies, marketing advertising agencies and the nonprofit world. The best brand strategists have a diverse portfolio. They think holistically, far outside operational silos. Being part of the Leadership Miami has sharpened those proficiencies which will benefit FIU and me. I will be better at directing FIU to communicate more effectively with integrity, excellence and tenacity.

In the words of DJ Khaled, Leadership Miami helped me discover “major keys to success.”

March Madness

March Madness apparently isn’t just about basketball. My March was absolutely BANANAS, in a good and quirky way. After having such a high from my awesome 32nd birthday, I went into March 2016 feeling excited, happy and energetic. That energy attracted a very memorable March:

DREAMS: Man….Vivid dreams have been part of my life since I was a child. This month, I woke up at at 3 am or 4 am, every 2 days from a dream...exhausting. These dreams leave me in shock, scared, happy, moved, confused or all five. I’m not sure why THIS month I've had all these dreams, but it helped me realize I totally need to get back to writing my poetry, my first love.

I also think God wants me to have early morning prayer because this waking up 2 and 3 hours before the alarm goes off is rough!

LOYALTY: My definition of “loyalty” was questioned this month. I learned that you can’t expect people to treat you with the same loyalty that you give. I’m a reciprocal person... until things aren’t reciprocal... Ironically, I felt it coming (a dream). Whenever things are peaceful and happy, the enemy usually issues me an emotional attack. The lessons on loyalty let me know I’ve grown, I’m still growing.

GROWTH: Speaking of growth, this month brought me some crazy/memorable moments, both personally and professionally. Every event forced me to remember to keep my peace and stay "intentional" in my actions and words.

Miami Night with Caity

Growth was also a big theme for March 2016 because for 30 days, I spent every day praying for my future husband. I participated in the Praying For The One You'll Love Forever challenge in which I wrote daily prayers for my husband. I'll give it to him on the day we get married.

The experience was such a blessing because I haven't been optimistic and enthusiastic about dating in YEARS! It also reassured me of what I already knew: I'm capable of selfless love and friendship.

FRIENDSHIP: Caity and I haven’t physically seen each other in 14 years. And although we’ve kept in touch and know about each other’s lives (thanks Facebook), we haven’t been around each other since we were teenagers. A lot has changed , but that’s why her visit to South Florida was a highlight of March. The connection we had back in July 2001 is now even stronger because of her visit. We laughed….a lot and we had some heart-to-heart talks that strengthened a bond that I value, love, and cherish. Love you, DBG!

Why my birthday means so much to me

My last birthday with my dad, Frankie

My biological father missed 31 of my birthdays. Not because he was a deadbeat dad or divorced my mom. It was because he was “taken to heaven” a month before I turned two.

My father, Francisco Ross, died at the age of 21. He’s been dead longer than he was alive, and that’s a reality I think about very often.

I don’t remember him. Not his smile, not his hug, not his voice. I only have pictures from our short time together and memories my mom shares with me. My curly/wavy hair is his and he loved cologne. That’s probably why I snuggle extra close to men when they wear it.

Often when we celebrate a birthday, we are commemorating the life of the person. For me, my celebratory manner, every year, is because I believe life should be spent happy, laughing and loving. I party for my birthday as a way to honor the life that’s no longer here, my Frankie’s. He only got to see 21 of his birthdays.

On February 10, I find myself thinking of my Frankie. I wonder if he’s proud of me, what he was

Frankie and me

thinking the day before I was born and was he afraid to hold my 8 pounds 6 ounces body. And then, on my birthday, every year, I thank God for his life and my mom’s. I thank God for their love and connection.

Losing a parent is heartbreaking. Losing a parent you can’t remember simply hurts, daily. I wish I could just talk to him, just once. I would listen to his stories, his advice and receive his love.

So when you see my pictures and videos on February 11 of me dancing, smiling and laughing, I’m often thinking, “I hope you can see me, Frankie. I’m doing really well. Your wishes and dreams for me are coming true."