2015 Recap

My 2015 Vision Board

With only 20 days left in 2015, I’ve been in deep reflection mode.

Usually at the end of the year, my mind is heavy with thoughts about all of the things I didn’t accomplish, but this year is different. Instead of giving energy to the things I didn’t do, I’m focusing and celebrating all of the amazing blessings and opportunities that 2015 provided.

ORDER: My 2015 word was “order” because I felt an internal push to make some changes. To get to what I wanted, I needed to align my thoughts, prayers, circle of friends and actions in a more orderly way. As a planner, I used Susannah Conway’s “Unraveling” to help me map out my 2015.

My goals were simple. Get my finances, physical, spiritual and emotional house in the best order I could by June 2015. Here’s what I accomplished in 2015:

1. On a couch I started and finished my psychotherapy. This experience helped me get over that final hump in my depression (that’s another post).
2. $$. I saved money for my move, although I had no job or idea of where I would land. I applied to jobs in Florida, Hawaii and California and considered Africa, London and Spain.
3. Lost flab I lost 7 pounds. I worked with a nutritionist to help me stay accountable with my eating. It was a really hard process but worth it. 
4. Jesus time Although I joined New Life Covenant years ago, I still hadn’t finished the New Members classes. Triflin, I know. So, I finally did and joined a ministry. I miss them so much.
5. Carpe Diem.I told all my friends that this was my last year in Chicago and that we need to live each moment like it was our last. Again, I had zero job but I knew my time was ending in Chicago. 
6. Toxic Friendship Supporting, loving and caring for undeserving people is silly and hurtful, especially when someone questions your integrity and honesty. It was time for mine to end.
7. Time, talent, treasure I extended my philanthropy to financial support. For my 30th, I had a giving plan, but I was unable to fulfill it. I modified it a bit. I gave $19.13 to 8 organizations.
8. Faith steps I stepped out on faith, again. Moving to Chicago was a huge leap of faith. I had no friends, no family and no job. I did the same with my summer move to Miami. I had no friends or family here, but I just trusted God would show up. He has.
9. Jetsetter I traveled. A lot. Ohio, California (multiple trips there), Philly, Florida and Phoenix were my destinations. I enjoyed family and friends while celebrating life and love.
10. OO-OOP I became active and financial with Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. I’m not proud of this fact, but I took a break from DST, financially and through my participation. But my undergrad chapter’s 50th anniversary sparked that love and loyalty that I had when I joined. Feels good to be back!

What did you accomplish in 2015?

Reading Challenge 2015

Belle's library in Beauty and the Beast

Last year, I read 20 books in between rebranding an organization, going to the gym, hanging out
with friends, and trying new recipes. Some folks claim they are too busy to read which I believe is nonsense. You make time for things you find important. Reading is important to me and I love it. I also want a library like the one Belle received in Beauty and the Beast

This year, I’m challenging myself to read 30 books by the end of the year. On Goodreads, I’m tracking my progress. Currently, I’ve read 8 and just purchased book #9, so I’m a little behind.

Here’s what I’ve read so far:

1. The Secret by Rhonda Byrne 
2. I’ve Got You Under My Skin by Mary Higgins Clark 
3. Luckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll 
4. A Matter of Choice by Nora Roberts 
5. The Perfect Marriage by Kimberla Lawson Roby 
6. Disgruntled by Asali Solomon 
7. Citizen Creek by Lalita Tademy 
8. A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles” by Marianne Williamson 

Book #9 is The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic and Madness at the Fair That Changed America by Erik Larson. Book #10 is Design Matters: An Essential Primer-Brochures, Logos, Packaging, Portfolios by Capsule, Maura Keller, Michelle Taute.

I need your help! What books should I add to my list so I can reach my goal? I like all types of genres and I have plenty of beaches to explore in Miami. Leave a comment below with your book suggestions.

My male bestie is jumping the broom

Denise and Cornel supporting my work for an Obama fundraiser
October 2007

I have two male best friends: Cornel and Jovon.

Over the past 5 years, life has made my friendships with both men flourish and reach a place none of us ever saw coming. Both men have prayed with me, for me, and given me the hard advice and love that was sometimes was difficult to hear. Their honesty, rawness and support has shaped me, educated me, and uplifted me. My friendship, with both men, is priceless.

This weekend, I am flying to San Diego to witness the union between Cornel and my new sister, Jamie. I might cry.

You see, Cornel has been a brother to me since the day I met him. I can’t explain it. We just clicked. I felt like I've known him for longer than only 9 years. It could be that Cornel talks a lot and enjoys being challenged. My sarcastic ways/tone made him talk more! Eventually, we both started listening and found out we had a lot in common but very different, too.

Since our initial meeting in 2006 when I first arrived in Chicago, we have supported each other in ways unknown to many. All big dreams, thoughts or concerns, we shared with each, hoping for honest feedback and prayer.

A week before his 30th birthday, Cornel called me. “Aye, sis. I wanna talk to you about something.”

Jamie, me and Cornel in L.A.
April 2015

He was planning to propose to his girlfriend on his birthday. I liked her, although I had only heard stories about her from him. She made my friend happy and motivated him to be better. His smile and demeanor was different because of her. So as usual, I gave him feedback and honesty on his proposal speech. Shorten and be sappy. I also applauded the awesome job he did on her engagement ring!

Cornel, I dedicate this blog post to you to extol you. Black men often don’t hear that people celebrate them, so I want you to know that I’m so proud of you. Stating that I admire you and all the work you’ve done to become the man you are today wouldn’t properly communicate how excited I am about this next journey in life.

Proverbs 18:22 says "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD." You prayed for Jamie and God blessed you with someone who is supportive and beautiful. Jamie is a gift. The favor you have had in so many areas of your life is a true testimony about the power of order, prayer and perseverance. Jamie is an amazing woman and beautiful catch. I can't wait for our future trips :)

I appreciate your focus on living a purposeful and productive life. Keep God in your life and He will continue to order your steps, according to His plan. I’m thrilled to be there to celebrate this moment with you and the start of your family. You deserve this happiness and I’m proud to call you brother.

Just stay out of the way when I dance with your daddy :)